Earlier in this chapter, I mentioned the idea of “sexual cybernetics,” of getting in touch with the natural flow of your marital and sexual system. You have made some tapes and started the process of system enhancement in Chapter One’s opportunity. Now try this next step toward super marital sex.
Reverse everything you can in your marital system. For one week, change sides of the bed, change who gets up in the morning first, redistribute household chores, change who drives or who drives what car, just change everything. Change who cooks, who makes the beds, who watches television, who reads. Sit down together and plan this out.
Be sure to include your children in the planning of these changes. Get their input as to who does what in the marriage and their ideas on how to do this “cybernetics reversal” opportunity. It is cybernetic because it will make you more aware, more in touch with the other side of things in your marital system. These changes will not be easy, but you are not working for an easy sex marriage, you are working for a super sex marriage, one that is much wider, deeper, richer, and adaptable than you ever imagined.
When I presented this opportunity to the couple you have just read about, the husband responded, “Wait a minute. What does this have to do with our sex problem? What does this have to do with sex?” I didn’t have to answer. His wife took over. “I’ll tell you what it has to do with sex,” she explained. “It will give us a chance to learn from each other, maybe experience a little of what we each experience. I can’t wait to watch you fix dinner. And I guess I’ll have to get out my old baseball glove.”
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